Accepting Yourself Unconditionally

You take yourself with you wherever you go, so I suggest you become your own best friend and avoid having to be perfect. When you "should" on yourself and others, you become upset and begin doubting how you think and feel. Free yourself from the stinking thinking that causes excessive stress and a loss of self-confidence. While teaching, many times students would ask me what I thought would be a perfect gift for my children if I had a choice. An ideal gift would be a huge dose of self-esteem. A gift that cannot be purchase at Saks Fifth Avenue or Neiman Marcus. It's simply not for sale. The choice is yours.

I suggest you develop the habit of challenging any and all negative head-talk that often undermines your self-confidence. In other words, "fake it until you make it." It works!

About the approval from others, accept the fact that regardless of how kind, generous and talented you may be, you will never please everyone all the time. Wanting approval is natural, but needing it presents problems. Your happiness, confidence, motivation, and assertive skills merge when you find the pleasures and activities you enjoy. Be sure your major life choices are ones that please you and not someone else. You have the right to think you're terrific, because you are.

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